Parental Peer Pressure
The grocery store line, a school music concert, the public library – they are all places where innocent strangers are exposed to our kids’ misbehavior… and we are exposed to humiliation. When we feel staring eyes and judgmental pressure, we are being affected by the intimidation of “Parental Peer Pressure”. Instead of squirming or getting angry here are some suggestions to help you face this parental peer pressure head on:
1. Realize that all kids are going to have their moments. And some of those moments are bound to be witnessed by other people. During these times, help assist your child to view their mistakes as learning opportunities and resist the urge to overreact during that moment.
2. Have a plan for staying calm. When you get frustrated with your kids have a pre-practiced response so you don’t find both yourself and your children ranting and raving. Here are some to try:
- “No problem” (What you mean is it is not a problem for you, but it will definitely be one for them when you are in a private place where you can address their actions)
- “This is so sad” (What you mean is this is so sad for them that they did not make a wise choice in how to act)
3. Make your ultimate goal is to raise great kid… not to impress the neighbors.
Even as adults, the pressure of being a parent can sometimes be overwhelming. Staying calm and avoiding reactions you later may regret is a challenge – probably more than we’d like to admit. But, you can be proactive about the things that you can do to stay calm when kids cause frustration. So, understanding that parents feel peer pressure too will help you take steps to set yourself (and your children) up for success when things get intense.